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N1993, i had my first opportunity to visit russia as a representative of the university of california. i was there to provide some technical assistance in the area of agricultural labor management. "russians are a very polite people," i had been tutored before my arrival. one of my interpreters, once i was there, explained that a gentleman will pour the limonad (type of juice) for the ladies and show other courtesies. toward the end of my three week trip i was invited by my young russian host and friend nicolai vasilevich and his lovely wife yulya out to dinner. at the end of a wonderful meal yulya asked if i would like a banana. i politely declined and thanked her, and explained i was most satisfied with the meal. but the whole while my mind was racing: "what do i do? do i offer her a banana even though they are as close to her as they are to me? what is the polite thing to do? " "would you like a banana? " i asked yulya."yes," she smiled, but made no attempt to take any of the three bananas in the fruit basket. "what now? " i thought."which one would you like? " i fumbled."that one," she pointed at one of the bananas. so all the while thinking about russian politeness i picked the banana yulya had pointed at and peeled it half way and handed it to her. smiles in yulya and nicolai's faces told me i had done the right thing. after this experience i spent much time letting the world know that in russia, the polite thing is to peel the bananas for the ladies. sometime during my third trip i was politely disabused of my notion. "oh no, grigorii davidovich," a russian graciously corrected me. "in russia, when a man peels a banana for a lady it means he has a romantic interest in her." how embarrassed i felt. and here i had been proudly telling everyone about this tidbit of cultural understanding.certain lessons have to be learned the hard way. some well meaning articles and presentations on cultural differences have a potential to do more harm than good and may not be as amusing. they present, like my bananas, too many generalizations or quite a distorted view.some often-heard generalizations about the hispanic culture include: hispanics need less personal space, make less eye contact, touch each other more in normal conversation, and are less likely to participate in a meeting. generalizations are often dangerous, and especially when accompanied by recommendations such as: move closer when talking to hispanics, make more physical contact, don't expect participation, and so on. here is an attempt to sort out a couple of thoughts on cultural differences. my perspective is that of a foreign born-and-raised hispanic who has now lived over two decades in the united states and has had much opportunity for international travel and exchange.
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