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For 12 seemingly endless years, you dutifully went to parent-teacher conferences and sat on those little chairs. you returned phone calls from the school nurse even though she used the word "measles." you typed term papers about the louisiana purchase. you helped your kid get through it all-- the school yard squabbles, the first boy/girl party, the first car date, the prom. and now, you'll get to help once again. but this time he (or she) is wearing an outfit that you approve of: a cap and gown. but don't go getting nostalgic yet. your parental work is not completely done, for you and your son or daughter still haven't agreed on what the proud graduate will wear under that graduation gown. the only outfit that "breathes" less than a graduation gown is a space suit. nothing is worse than a graduate who squishes across the stage, so think light, airy fabrics like cotton and linen. unless the school has specific rules (and many do), please make sure that miss graduate is wearing something easy and elegant-- a simple dress or a skirt and blouse would be perfect. whatever she chooses, what's underneath should be in a light color if her graduation gown is white (or yellow). not only is it cooler, but nothing ruins the look of that hard-earned graduation gown more than seeing the faint outline of the magenta dress underneath (which, of course, you won't even notice until the pictures come back). depending on school customs, mr. graduate may need to wear a tie. if so, this is the time to borrow a rep tie or foulard from dad to wear with a neatly pressed shirt in white, blue or another pale color. either a spread collar or button down, both are perfectly fine. even if a tie is not required, it looks so much better that you ought to bribe him to do it. don't insist on dress trousers; neatly pressed casual khaki or olive drab is fine. however, draw the line at jeans and shorts. ironically, just about the only part of a graduate that is actually visible to the audience is footwear. girls should go with a moderately dressy shoe (either flats or pumps are fine but, please, nothing that would look at home in a mosh pit). boys need to wear either a loafer or dress shoe. graduation is not the place for flip-flops, sandals, tennis shoes or bunny slippers, regardless of the gender of the graduate. nor is graduation the time for your kid to affix a message out of masking tape letters to the top of her mortarboard or the back of her gowns. do your best to discourage it. once you determine that your graduate probably is not going to humiliate himself (or you) by mooning the audience à la robin williams in patch adams, who should you invite to watch him march across the stage? to whom are you going to send announcements?
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